Snowy Day essentials: A Practical Guide to Jonas

In case you hadn’t heard…NEWSFLASH it’s gonna snow on the East Coast this weekend…like A LOT. Just because we’re gonna be knee deep in the fluffy cold stuff doesn’t mean you can’t be both productive and chic during your snowstorm times. Here’s some ideas for both things to do as well as things to wear and eat…because obviously you need a guide for these sorts of things. You’re welcome.

DSCF7252

The snow will be just like this but like…much deeper.

Friday:

The snow is starting to really come down as you arrive home. You know what you need. WINE! If you haven’t already picked up enough bottles from Trader Joe’s…well then, it’s too damn late now, fam. I recommend Club W for next time, it’s basically a recommend-er engine for wine. They’ll send you 3 curated wines a month right to your door!

Snuggle up in a perfectly soft blanket and watch the sky fill with snow while you watch my new most favorite show ever, “Mozart In the Jungle” on Hulu and let the comedy/sounds of beautiful orchestral music lull you into a snow and wine induced coma.

Once you’ve finished season one, check out this warming recipe for Nutella croissants (literally just get those freezer croissants and spread nutella on them before you roll em up. Bake for 10 min at 350) and munch the night away with whoever your cabin mate for the next three days is (mine is my roommate and we eat like 10 of these each).

Saturday:

Likely your power is out, so get busy doing things that you can’t do when you have wifi (well you CAN do them, you just don’t). Start out by perusing Goodreads (on your dying phone) and picking out a few books to add to your Kindle or start ACTUALLY reading the books on your bookshelf. Don’t have books? Read all the boxes and shampoo bottles in your house… you could learn something.

Next start on some household chores. Maybe you want to use the Marie Kondo method to make your house more tidy, or maybe you just really want to finally organize your desktop or clean your fridge, whatever it is…get to it. Distract yourself from the chore factor by pumping some Jams on your phone (don’t worry you’re good because you’ve got your handy dandy solar backup charger) and drinking a big glass of “Not Your Father’s Rootbeer” because it’s flipping delicious, or making this ridiculously good Kahlua and cream mudslide recipe cocktail thing:

  • 1 cup milk
  • 1 oz. Kahlua
  • 1 oz. Baileys
  • 1 oz. Caramel or Chocolate syrup
  • stir and then shake over ice

The rest of the day? Meh! Take a nap! Cuz screw it. Or go make a snow angel, or another mudslide. Whatever.

Sunday:

Guys are you even serious. Screw this snow. This apartment is too small to contain you. Go outside. Make a single snow angel and then forget the entire thing and come back inside.

Make yourself the single best ever grilled cheese. The secret is using real cheese not some gross shredded cheese or whatever…and real crusty bread. I recommend using Cave Aged Cheddar and Trader Joe’s Santa Fe whole wheat sourdough for the best results. Also make sure to use real butter, because you’re not messing the eff around here.

As for the drink of the day? Pretend it’s not even winter and turn up your heat (you know if you have it or whatever) and make a flowery gin cocktail:

  • 1 part gin to 1 part lavendar syrup,
  • add a little simple syrup up in there to flavor things up.
  • Shake with some sprite or drink it straight up).

YUMMMM!

Finish up that book or project you started on yesterday and prepare for your work to inevitably make you come in despite THUNDERSNOW!

Monday:

UGH! You have another day off…I wouldn’t normally say this..but like…at this point cabin fever has set in.

Great idea! Did you play an instrument in Middle school…GET IT OUT. This will have the dual effect of making your roommate want to kill you (yes sweet death! an escape from the snow!) and also giving your neighbors the first sound of music they may have heard since they lost power way back on Saturday (bonus!). Highly recommend using piccolo or oboe or other annoying wind instruments and playing a highly obnoxious Christmas song all morning long. Or experimental jazz played a quarter step down and mostly flat. People love that.

You should probably just drink your moldy milk by this time. Screw it.

Build a snow fort on your deck or roof and throw snowballs at children as they run by. Yell “ThIS IS FOR THE ALAMO” and run away if they catch you. Use a sled as a getaway vehicle.

Tuesday:

Just go to work even if you don’t have work. Because that’s the only way you can stay sane. Plus your roommate has probably already evicted you by this time…so yeah. Go make yourself a nice igloo.

 

A very happy and sane Jonas to all of you!

❤ CharmCityThriftanista

 

 

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